Today is the 71st birthday of the legendary Chuck Norris.
If you haven't studied Norrisology, you might be surprised to learn that Chuck Norris has accomplished much more than just starring in a bunch of B-rated movies and one of the worst TV shows ever created: Walker, Texas Ranger.
Here are some Chuck Norris facts...
Chuck Norris counted to infinity...twice.
When Chuck Norris does a pushup, he's not pushing himself up - he's pushing the world down.
Chuck Norris wasn't born - he just got tired of wearing his mother,
The "Black Eyed Peas" used to be known simply as "The Peas" - until they met Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris' tears cure cancer. Too bad he has never cried.
Chuck Norris made a Happy Meal cry.
Chuck Norris does not hunt because the word hunting infers the possibility of failure. Chuck Norris goes killing.
Chuck Norris roundhouse kicked the earth a billion years ago - and it's still spinning.
When the Boogeyman goes to sleep every night he checks his closet for Chuck Norris.
Chuck Norris has already been to Mars - and that's why there are no signs of life on Mars.
Chuck Norris sold his soul to the devil for his rugged good looks and unparalleled martial arts ability. Shortly after the transaction was finalized, Chuck roundhouse kicked the devil in the face and took his soul back. The devil, who appreciates irony, couldn't stay mad and admitted he should have seen it coming. They now play poker every second Wednesday of the month.
Happy birthday, Chuck!
