Sunday, January 28, 2007

Those Darn Terrorists!


I went to Washington, D.C. in October 2001 on a business trip. Our travel policy mandates that trips over a certain distance must be by air, but for this trip I asked for a waiver. It was only a few weeks after 9-11, and I simply was not yet comfortable with the thought of getting on a commercial airliner.

So I drove the 6 hours or so to Washington. I met up with our federal lobbyist (Becky), and we made the rounds, visiting many members of the Ohio congressional delegation.

That evening I met up with a House staffer from Ohio for dinner and drinks. I won't mention his name, but he has since become infamous for his involvement with the Jack Abramoff scandal. Then it was off to the hotel for a night of rest.

Becky and I met again in the morning to finish our visits. One of those stops was at the Hart Senate Office Building, where Senator Voinovich set up shop. I was hoping to get out of town by noon, and I was feeling optimistic about making it, until word started going around about the anthrax that was found in Senator Tom Dashle's office. Dashle was located in the Hart Building, one floor away from Senator Voinovich.

By the time I heard about the anthrax, Becky and I had already separated. But before hitting the road, I tried to call her to see if there was anything for us to worry about. It took a very long time to reach her - the cell phone system wasn't able to handle the volume of calls made that day - but eventually we were able to talk. She told me that the word she had been given was that anyone who had been in the Hart Building since yesterday morning had to be tested for anthrax. I asked where I was supposed to go, and she told me the tests were being done in the Hart Building.

Now, I'm not the brightest guy in the world, but I was puzzled. Why were we going back into the Hart Building to be tested for anthrax, when that was the very building in which the anthrax had been found? But that's where I went.

After waiting in line for close to two hours, someone finally decided that we shouldn't be in the Hart Building after all. That's when they started handing out numbers to everyone in the line. We were told to go to a different building, and our numbers would indicate our places in the line at that building.

It was a mess. I started thinking that I might have to make a reservation for another overnight, because the line was moving very slowly, and there were hundreds upon hundreds of people in the line. So I took a different tack. I called a friend who knows about things like anthrax spores, and asked him how long it would take for them to start doing their deadly duty. He told me I had about 24 hours to be tested, and while waiting for results to come back, I would need to start taking Cipro.

That was good enough for me, so I walked away from the line and made my way to my car. I started back for Ohio, with plans to stop by a local hospital in the morning to take the test. It was going to be late before I would get back to Columbus, but I decided to make a stop at Antietam to see the civil war battlefield. It's less than an hour from the outskirts of Washington, and I figured that an hour or two taking a tour was not going to kill me.

The battle site is something to behold, but only if one is imaginative. It's a very large tract of land, and only with the help of a detailed visitor's guide was I able to imagine what happened there...and many terrible things happened there. Two sides were fighting for an ideal, and neither would give up easily. I thought about what had happened in a US Senate office building the day before, and at other locations a few weeks before. The irony of this situation was not lost on me. After an hour or so of touring the grounds, I headed back toward the freeway.

About that time, my friend called and said that he had been mistaken: anthrax takes only 8 to 12 hours to incubate, and I should not wait until morning.

What to do? I wasn't about to drive into a small Maryland town and tell them I needed to be tested for anthrax. Instead, I drove back to Columbus and stopped at Grant Hospital before I went home. I arrived sometime around midnight. The doctor in the ER had never done an anthrax test before, and I hope I never have to endure another. Imagine a 12 inch Q-Tip being shoved into each nostril -- as far as it can be shoved -- and you'll start to appreciate the nature of the test. My eyes water just thinking about it.

I went home and started taking Cipro as directed by the ER doctor. It took a few days for the test results to come back, but as it turned out I was not exposed to anthrax, and life went on. A memorable part of the experience was looking at the weekly news magazines the following week, seeing the pictures of lines of people waiting for the anthrax test, and looking for people I knew...and even looking for myself.

I don't think the feds are a bit closer to solving this crime than they were that day I waited in a line at the Hart building, and Washington will never be the welcoming place it used to be, or at least not in my lifetime. We have certain people to blame for that...most of them of a particular religion. And to them I say, shame on you.

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